Where is the trigger for depression?

Hi, my name is Julio and I’m a depressed person.

People who know me knows that I suffer from depression. I can recall being depressed even when I was just a teenager, but just lately things got pretty worst. I try to fight it but sometimes it is just a lost war. I’m just there, minding my own business, doing something when everything became bland and I don’t have any motivation to do anything, a general apathy for everything, even myself.

I just wish I could know what triggers that. I don’t like being depressed, it is worst than a general pain because you try to take the pain away. When you are depressed, you don’t feel like fighting it. And without any help from yourself, you can’t do much and things move from bad to worst, and you just can’t get out of it. If I knew what triggers it, I could avoid it but without a clue, I would need to avoid everything, which is basically the same thing as being depressed.

Some people may say that my depression is pathological, that my brain chemical reactions are unbalanced and that there are medications to solve it. The problem, in my opinion, is that those remedies usually change your behaviour and I think we are what we are. If I took some drug that changes the way I’m, what would I be?

I still don’t know why I did post this. But it made me feel somewhat better.

[And you can shut the fuck up, ]